I am me

Time gets away from all of us.

I'm really not sure where I am spiritually right now. I am pagan. But I am not wiccan. I am not practicing anything in particular right now. I have no altar. I have no specific anything.

I am floating along. Waiting for inspiration and guidance.

I am me. Finding who I am.

Candles and Crayons

You can read about Braeden's diagnosis here. I won't go through it all again, just say that it is officially an autism diagnosis.

As of right now, I am tired. I am worn down and exhausted.

Tonight I am going to take a hot bubble bath, light some candles, drink some wine and color some pictures using my son's crayons. They may even be x rated.

It's all about pampering tonight folks.

Blog Dust

I am in the process of syncing up my two separate google accounts, the one that was exclusively for this blog and my mundane persona. If I am following your blog as Tracy from WitchPath2Take, that google account will no longer be active. I now have to try to make it back and follow everyone using my regular google account, Tracy DeLuca.... sigh.... I made things too complicated when I started this blog. Now it is time to simplify.....

Return Of The Fae Lady

Honestly, it seems like I just stepped away from blogland for a moment and here it has been forever since I posted! I am well. The children are well. I am trying not to stress out and am just taking a day at a time. I meet with the psychologist on Monday for an official diagnosis for Braeden and that is weighing heavily on me this weekend but I am trying to keep positive.

My garden is doing wonderful so far this year and we have already enjoyed several fresh salads harvested completely from our own garden. My herbs are just exploding into life and I even took sage leaves up to the restaurant last night when they ran out! My sage was better than what they have been buying from their produce supplier. Nyah nyah nyah...... LOL

I am in the middle of a major life change I think. I am trying to exercise and lose weight. I am changing my diet with the intention of going even further towards vegetarianism without forcing my husband to give up his meat (lol). I am picking my knitting and sewing back up and plan to start writing articles again. I need to focus on things that make me happy and fulfill me as a person and a woman, not just as a Mother.

My tarot cards are languishing in their bag, waiting for me to get time and energy to begin working with them. I love tarot, but I have been so conflicted that I haven't felt as if I had any energy to put into learning anything new right now.

I have still visited many of you when I had spare time, even though I have not posted. I will be making the rounds and trying to actually comment soon.

Thank you one and all for the supportive comments. Blessings to all of you.

All Will Be Well

I'm sitting on the ground on top of the green spring grass, under the spreading limbs of a pink blossomed tree... watching my boys run and play with June sitting next to me. A cool wind is blowing and if I look over my shoulder, I can see the new sprouts coming up in my garden. Radishes, lettuce and spinach are all breaking ground. All but two of my broccoli seedlings are doing great. My herbs are flourishing (recovering from a late cold snap). I have lavender, rosemary, tarragon, sage and oregano planted. I am still in search of a basil seedling and maybe a few more. I have many other seeds to plant but am enjoying seeing the beginnings of the garden show their faces.

The past week has been tough. I am full of self doubt, anxiety and depression.

I am sitting under the tree. Sinking myself into the ground. Feeling my soul sighing as I reconnect with the Earth, Nature and the Mother.

Little pink blossoms are falling on my hair.

I think it means I am loved. All will be well.

Thank you all for the comments. For the thoughts. For the warmth of your blessings.

I am back.

Lost in Every Day

It's been a rough couple of weeks. For those who do not follow my other blog, I will just say that I am struggling with adjusting my thinking regarding the diagnosis of my son with autism. I have spent a lot of the past 2 weeks just ignoring everything online. I have spent much time talking to my husband and just getting my head on straight. I think I am okay and ready for the adventures ahead for my son and all of us. And maybe I can get back to this blogging thing again!

Miss June used some of her birthday money to get me a surprise.... when we were in the bookstore the other day I had picked out a set of tarot cards that I loved but ended up putting back due to finances. June ordered them on Amazon for me and they were delivered a few days ago! She rocks. So thoughtful! And the cards are gorgeous! It is the Mystic Faerie deck and I am in love with them....

I have spent the past few weeks completely absorbed with mundane research and everyday minutiae. I have not read any of my books, have not visited many blogs and have not done anything even vaguely spiritual. I feel adrift. I need to ground myself and get back in touch with where I am headed spiritually.

Sharing and Caring

Miss June and I had a wonderful Imbolc. She wrote, planned and led our ritual for the evening and did an absolutely wonderful job. Seeing as how it was one of my very first rituals/ ceremonies, it really meant a lot to me to have her involved. I am still very awkward feeling when it comes to rituals.... know what I mean? Part of what we did involved creating something to share with each other and the God and Goddess. I wrote a poem and I thought I would share it with all of you as well.

O, gentle night,
full of promise and memory,
bringing rebirth and renewal,
cleansing the Earth
and the soul.

New life trembles
on the verge of birth and growth.
Knowledge enters
into the hearts
of the unknowing.

The Maiden waits
to dance amongst the flowers,
to embrace the budding trees,
to gently watch over us
as we take our steps towards spring.

Sharing with Miss June and celebrating together certainly made the night more intense and special for me. I can see why many witches are drawn to coven work rather than solo. However, I think in the long run I am such a private person that sharing that with a large number of people might make me uncomfortable. Does that make sense?

ANyway.

Miss June has a birthday coming up fast. She is turning 16. Wow. I can't believe how fast the time has gone! I have several ideas in my head for her birthday celebration to make them a little more special for her, but I could REALLY use some help. Anyone who feels like lending some brain power, answering a few questions or otherwise helping me plan for her birthday, please email me at faeriecastle at yahoo dot com. I don't want to go into any details on here because, you know, she reads this blog! Hi June! Her birthday is on February 17th.

Thank you all so much for reading, commenting and giving me (us) your support as we walk this path! You have no idea (maybe you do) how much it means to me.